Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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