i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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