if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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