sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Randomize
