Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Even my vagina gasped.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
