fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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