I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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