Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Shame is for Republicans.
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