a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
