Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize