Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
accomplished twins. life is a go
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
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