I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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