is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
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I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
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Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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