So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Is it penis luge time yet?
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
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