What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
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