I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
My pussy is not your playground.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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