Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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