Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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