I can tuck mytits in my pants
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
True strength comes from lack of pants
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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