You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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