think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
