he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
