I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Operation Purity has been aborted
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Randomize
