Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
