stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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