A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize
