You're so nebulous sometimes
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
