escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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