I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
