i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
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