Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize