I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
