Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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