Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
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