I want you more than these girls want KFC
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
The air taste purple.
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