you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
