ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
