Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
