i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Randomize
