My girlfriend figured out who you are.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
