my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
