No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize