it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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