This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
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