I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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