Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize