What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
