Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
