just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
If I had your ass I would rule the world
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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