that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize