Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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